I won't spank my children and as a result they will have respect for others.

So it has definitely been a while since I haven't written down on the good old blog! Definitely my New Years resolution will be to write in it more. I'm sorry my first post in a while is something so serious, or not really an update on our lives, but this is my venting place and this is something I wish to vent about.

So I swear all I see lately on FB are all these pictures with quotes like "Support Phil Roberston" and "It's None of My Business How People Live Their Lives", but my favorite right now is the picture of just a quote that says "My parents spanked me as a child.... as a result I now suffer from a psychological condition known as 'Respect for Others'. Simply peachy right? So funny!

Now before I start my rant I want it clear that I'm not necessarily against spanking. I'm not over radical about how spanking has psychological effects. I know that it's "just a funny picture", but since I feel like I have been seeing this picture every day for the past week, I want to take it literally for a minute and I want to take the opportunity to voice my opinion about it.

First of all, I want to state that spanking doesn't not, in fact, cause a psychological condition known as respect for others. Now now remember what I said! I'm not a radical, but it simply doesn't!

So you guys must be thinking "Jacey! You are not a parent yet! You have no idea the struggles and realities of raising a child. You have no idea, you might just one day spank your child! How could you even have an opinion yet?" That is SO true! I have zero personal experience! I have not had to be up for hours at night cuddling a colicky baby. I have not had the pleasure of my child throwing a tantrum in the middle of a grocery store. I have not had the fear run through my veins watching my child try to run into the middle of the street. I have not yet experienced the feeling of a child being so naughty that they just need a good spankin' for them to knock it off. I do however take parenting and motherhood very seriously. Those who have known me for a long time know that my dream is to be a mother that our Savior can be proud of. My biggest desire is to send out good men and women into the world who I guess as the picture put it "suffer from a psychological condition known as Respect for Others"

So what's my opinion? Spanking your child will not make them respect others, respecting others yourself will help children to respect others.

Now like I said I am not necessarily against it all together, I might pop my kids depending on what exactly they do, but Husband and I have already communicated that spanking will NOT be our primary form of punishment. I don't believe a few times in a childhood will necessarily scar a person for life and I think those people that were only spanked a few times in their own childhood are the ones that share that photo. I do believe however that if you make spanking or screaming your primary form of punishment then you are teaching your child that when someone does something disappointing or wrong that it's Ok to fly off the handle. I never have nor never will see spanking my child as me keeping it together. Most of the times I was spanked myself I did not see it has my parents punishing me for something I did wrong, I saw it as them losing their temper and all I did was lose my temper more.

So if spanking didn't teach me respect for others then what did? Well all those times I saw my father make friendly conversations with strangers, holding doors and smiling, that taught me respect and kindness. All those times my mom came to my school to help with craft projects, that taught me patience and charity. Every time my clutzy self spilled a drink on the carpet and my dad simply said "accidents happen lets go clean it up together", that taught me responsibility and understanding. Any time my parents talked me through my struggles and wrong doings, and then decided on appropriate punishment, that taught me love and respect. Like most children I watched people. I studied examples of all sorts and as I have been growing up I have been able to discern between what I believe is good and bad. I believe children are so smart. They notice everything and just want to be like the big people. They are constantly looking for examples of how the world should act.

Now I'm not here to say that if you lose a your temper a couple of times you're an awful parent (because I know I will). I'm not even here to say that if you don't spank your children then they will all turn out to be perfect little angels (because I know mine won't). I believe that the biggest example in a child's life is their parents. As we grow up we start to realize the things we do now that our parents did in the past.  I want to be a mother that uses the Savior as her prime example in my life so that my children can use me as a GOOD example in theirs. I want to be someone that shows respect and charity to strangers and loved ones a like so that my children might someday pick up that disorder known as "Respect for Others".

Well that was a nice little venting sesh! Thanks guys!


Love,
Some Crazy Future Mom.

Mesa so Far.

Mesa has been very good to us so far! Nic is loving his new job and learning a lot! I love that Nic has his degree in Exercise Science because he's all about being healthy. We've been working out a lot more and we're ready to lose that "married weight".

I've had some pretty exciting things happen to me these past couple weeks as well! If you're not on Facebook than you might not know that I have started school in Cosmetology. I go to the Regency Beauty Institute here in Mesa and I am having so much fun! I've never been so excited to get up in the mornings! The biggest lesson I've learned is how much people take cosmetologists for granted. They don't realize how much we have to know, and what people skills we have to have to make people feel good on the inside, and look good on the outside. I'm in love with this industry!

(I decorated my apron! My childhood nickname was beaniebaby... I couldn't get an I.E.)

Also, in my LDS ward I was called to be the First Counselor of the Young Women! Young Women is such a great program! We teach girls from 12-18 about their individual worth, how to strengthen the community, and much more! The girls are so great and I'm so excited to get to know them!

Nic and I love Mesa! We went to the Mesa temple a few weeks ago. It is such a gorgeous place!

 We also love that it's January and we can practice our golf swings!

Mesa can get pretty lonely since we don't have a ton of family and friends around us, but that's why we're especially thankful for the Toblers! Steve is Nic's boss and second cousin... I think. He's Nic's Mom's cousin... if that couldn't get any more confusing! His wife Marie is teaching me how to crochet, and make bread!

We have a lot of fun with their family and they've been so wonderful to us!

Welp! That's Mesa so far! We're just staying extremely busy and are extremely thankful for the weekends!

Love,
The Bibeaus

P.S. HAPPY SIX MONTH ANNIVERSARY TO MY WONDERFUL MAN! YOU TRULY ARE MY OTHER (BETTER) HALF!

Merry Christmas to All!!

So I've been lacking a little lately! That's mostly because we haven't had internet in our NEW HOME!!! Shortly before X-mas Nic and I moved OUT of Utah to Mesa, Arizona.

Before I talk about Mesa though I just want to give a shout out to my best friend Mrs. Wursten! Haha. One of my best friends got married on 12/12/12 to an awesome guy! They were sealed in the Salt Lake City Temple. It was a wonderful ceremony and a fantastic day!

      Michelle and Nate's wedding reception was so great! They had hot chocolate and cinnamon rolls!

                                         Nic and I waiting for the couple outside of the Temple!

We did have some time before we left to visit with some friends and family!

 One weekend we had my sister, Shiloh's kids over for some great fun! Toddlers are certainly a handful! It was a blast though! We bought them toys, played on the playground, and made a gingerbread house! I love my bugs! I surely miss them!

After Nic's last week of school, I surprised him with 'The Hobbit' tickets, and then we met with our good friends Jayde and Caroline to go up to Salt Lake City. Here are Nic and I at the City Center Mall.

                                                            Nic and I at the temple lights!

The day before we left I got to spend time with this little guy! Easton is so big! I definitely miss this baby face!

Then it was off to ARIZONA!!! A big thanks to Nic's dad for helping us move everything in the snowy weather.

Nic's family met up with us at our new place for the holidays! My mother-in-law, Lezlie, was a huge help in putting the house together, and since we now live on a higher floor we were extremely thankful for Nic's dad and brother! Here are a few pics of the new house!

It's exciting having a home where I can put pictures up and make it all pretty! Mesa is a great city! Everything is close to us and Nic's boss (who is also Lezlie's cousin) and his family have been extremely awesome since they're like the only people we really know down here.

Christmas was great as well! The only pictures I have is of our Christmas spot...

We didn't really decorate much for Christmas except for our Christmas spot! (Thanks Lezlie for getting us stockings!) We were spoiled for Christmas! My Aunt Cristy and Uncle Vern got us a white house ornament! They're kind of a tradition in our family! Once your married Aunt Cristy will give your family an ornament from the White House! Well since I'm married I get to join in the fun! Also, we got dishes, a coffee table, some gift cards, Nic got me a white and gold watch, and I got him a new game controller. On Christmas day we went to see Les Miserables!! Good movie!!! Even Nic liked it!

Now Nic is working at his job, which is long, but he likes it, and I am starting beauty school this Monday!! I'm excited to start doing what I love!

One more shout out to my friend Trevor who just got home Jan. 2 from his mission in Texas!

Welp! That's about it! hopefully I can update something exciting soon!

Love,
The Bibeaus!